(photo by Jeffrey Zeldman)

New Yorkers don’t
eat pizza with a fork

New Yorkers will
give you directions if you
ask and don’t look too
crazy

New Yorkers don’t
smile all the time
but do
when it counts

New Yorkers don’t
like bull shit
and people telling us
who or what we are:
“socially liberal, pro-abortion,
pro-gay marriage, and
focus on money and the media.”

Some of those things are true
for some of us
but we don’t like
being labeled.
Do you?

We can do without you too,
Mr. Cruz
Don’t do any stumping
on our shores
or we’ll get our skankiest
Port Authority pigeons
to shit all over you